I Got a Gallery in the Wild - Chapter 29

A sloth—no, should I call him Speed Sloth now?

Speed Sloth looked at me with an expression dripping with leisurely disdain.

But I didn’t feel angry or anything like that. Instead, a surge of tension filled me.

Ttuduk!

The arrow he had snatched with his hand snapped in half.

More than that, what bothered me most was his claws. Claws that had grown hideously lethal.

The moment I get caught by those, my life is as good as over. I had no choice but to be tense.

’I don’t know when he’ll pounce.’

I couldn’t understand why he moved so sluggishly when he possessed such agility.

Maybe it’s something like this:

[The reason I fell to my knees was to gain momentum!]

Originally, sloths move slowly to conserve energy. Allfather told me that.

But since that’s difficult in the Forest of the Four Seasons, he evolved in a different direction.

Revealing tremendous agility only during moments of crisis, like just now.

It’s a remarkably plausible hypothesis. What a truly insane world.

Neurit- neurit-

Speed Sloth began to move slowly.

Perhaps because I had just seen that agility, he looked different to me now.

He wasn’t sluggish; he was just acting relaxed.

There was a reason Heavenly Demon and Allfather told me to be careful from the start.

’If your skill is exceptional, can you tell even through a video?’

I wasn’t really sure about that. Still, it was certain that their intuition was spot on.

In that case, how should I deal with him now? First, I set down the crossbow.

Shooting an arrow would be pointless since he’d just dodge or catch it with his hand.

’Hand-to-hand combat... honestly, I feel like I’d lose.’

I was at an overwhelming disadvantage in terms of speed. He caught an arrow by seeing it with his own eyes.

On the other hand, me? I could barely even track the trajectory of an arrow.

It was a situation where I couldn’t help but be tense. If I let my guard down, those claws might pierce my neck.

’No. If he wanted to pierce it, he would have done so already.’

This meant one of two things:

Either this Speed Sloth fellow is a pacifist, or he has no intention of killing me.

The former would be great, but the latter was potentially dangerous.

With that kind of speed and agility, he would definitely be a threat.

’...Or he could just be toying with me.’

Conversely, it could be that I wasn’t a threat, so he was taking it easy.

I watched Speed Sloth stealthily approaching, then glanced behind me.

Inside the iron bucket were the fish I caught this morning.

’Should I just give him these and make him leave quietly?’

It wasn’t a bad choice. The probability of winning if we fought was extremely low.

I had received an Elixir from Starlight Lady, but that was assuming I survived the initial hit.

The moment a vital point was struck directly, there was a high chance even an Elixir would be useless.

After mulling it over again and again, I slowly gripped my shield.

I didn’t grip my sword. Because I had a separate plan in mind.

Next, I adjusted the shield to face him and walked over to the iron bucket.

Even while I did so, he merely approached at an agonizingly slow pace.

Geugeugeuk! Geugeuk!

Before long, I dragged the iron bucket containing the fish with one hand.

I wondered if that guy really wanted the fish.

And Speed Sloth approached me with his characteristic slow movements.

As expected, it was clear he wanted the fish. At the same time, a question arose.

’Why on earth?’

I heard leaves were their staple diet, so why did he want fish?

Do animals that adapt to the Forest of the Four Seasons change their diet as well?

’Or is there something special about the fish?’

Suddenly, what Heavenly Demon had said crossed my mind.

That the fish I caught resembled spiritual beasts.

A spiritual beast harbouring an Inner Core inside. Whether that was true, I still didn’t know.

After brief deliberation, I first dragged the iron bucket into the cave.

Even though it made a pretty loud noise, Wonmo was sleeping away, completely blissfully ignorant of the world.

While someone here is feeling a threat to their life, someone else is sleeping like a log—it’s truly unfair.

’Well, he’s just a cub...’

Meanwhile, Speed Sloth entered the cave.

There was nowhere to run. I raised my sword and shield, remaining on high alert.

There was only one option left: strike when he reached for the fish.

Since I didn’t know when he might thrust those hideous claws at my throat, I planned to finish him off.

"..."

Then, Speed Sloth suddenly came to a halt.

Slow as he was, he had never stopped in his tracks, so I couldn’t help but be bewildered.

He was staring intently somewhere. I shifted my gaze in that direction as well.

Where he was looking was toward the sack containing the Fasting Pills.

Neurit- neurit-

"Uh-uh?"

Not the Fasting Pills! Flustered, I rushed to the sack holding the Fasting Pills.

As I snatched the sack, Speed Sloth quietly looked up at me.

Kkadak- kkadak-

In that state, he even wriggled his ferocious claws back and forth.

Anyone could see it meant "give me one."

It also felt like a threat that he’d kill me if I didn’t hand it over right away.This story is hosted at novеlping.com.

"...Should I give you one?"

"..."

Even at my question, he merely stared at me intently.

It was good that he turned his attention to Fasting Pills instead of the fish.

Besides, there were still plenty of Fasting Pills left.

I cautiously took out one Fasting Pill.

"T-This?"

"..."

Kok-

Without a word (not that he spoke in the first place), he poked the Fasting Pill with his claw.

He then slowly brought it to his mouth.

Even that action was agonizingly slow, making me nervous just watching him.

"Mmm."

"..."

Speed Sloth moved his jaws up and down as if savoring it.

These were the Fasting Pills that even the Owlbear and Wonmo spat out immediately, complaining that they were bitter.

Even I ate them strictly to survive, never for taste.

Yet he chewed and ate it thoroughly. Even his signature relaxed expression didn’t change at all.

Kkadak- kkadak-

"...You want one more?"

"..."

"That’s a bit hard to—"

Syuk!

Just as I was about to answer that I didn’t even have enough for myself.

Speed Sloth’s claw targeted my throat in the blink of an eye.

If it had gone just a little further, a gaping hole would have been carved into my neck.

I felt the blood throughout my entire body run cold. I couldn’t even track it with my eyes.

Kkadak- kkadak-

While I swallowed hard, Speed Sloth beckoned with his other hand.

Hand it over or die. That was clearly the nuance.

"...Ha. Fuck."

What a shitty world. Venting a sigh, I handed him another Fasting Pill.

At that, he withdrew his claws. Eating the second Fasting Pill, he had a satisfied look on his face.

Fortunately, two pills seemed to be his limit, as he didn’t ask for more.

What’s more, he didn’t seem interested in the fish anymore. I breathed a sigh of relief.

Eogijeok- eogijeok-

"Uh-uh? What? What are you doing?"

However, Speed Sloth’s strange antics didn’t end here.

He suddenly started climbing up my body!

He was considerate enough not to jab me with his sharp claws, so it didn’t even hurt.

Teok-

"..."

"..."

Finally, he rested his chin right on top of my head.

Does he think I’m some kind of tree bearing leaves?

It was so absurd I couldn’t even speak.

I wanted to pull him off, but I couldn’t do that either.

’If I force him off, I’m the only one who’ll suffer.’

If only because of those terrifyingly lethal claws, I couldn’t forcibly remove him.

The silver lining was that he barely had any weight.

Miraculously, he didn’t even smell bad. In fact, he smelled rather pleasant.

’This guy probably has mites too, though...’

Still, just in case, I should probably wash him. I let out a deep sigh.

Not even a week has passed, yet I’ve experienced all sorts of insane incidents and accidents.

There was only one place where anyone would hear out my venting.

Title) Getting extorted by a sloth in real-time

Wild Grylls

I’m the fixed handle user who posted the sloth earlier. This bastard ate a Fasting Pill and then threatened me with his claws to give him more ㅠㅠ

Life is so miserable. Imagine getting extorted by a sloth of all things in my life.

↳ Heavenly Demon) Did you yield simply because he pointed his claws at you?

↳ Wild Grylls) This bastard catches arrows by sight... At that speed, he almost jabbed my neck with his claw.

↳ Heavenly Demon) Hm. If that is the case, it is somewhat understandable. Perhaps he could make a very good sparring partner.

↳ Wild Grylls) You want me to spar with a sloth?;;

↳ Heavenly Demon) Since you said you were slower than the sloth, it would not be bad.

↳ Wild Grylls) Sigh;

↳ Sword Matstar) What is that sloth doing right now?

↳ Wild Grylls) He’s clinging to my back.

↳ Sword Matstar) What kind of bullshit is that again?

↳ Wild Grylls) Sounds like bullshit, right? It’s real. I’ll post a picture later.

↳ Never in my life did I expect to hear a story about a sloth extorting a human and clinging to them lololol

↳ Legend lolol

↳ Is it really even a sloth?

↳ Wild Grylls) I arbitrarily named him Speed Sloth, yeah.

↳ Speed Sloth lolol

↳ Still better than Fluffy lol

↳ Wild Grylls) What’s wrong with Fluffy?

↳ Don’t Abandon the Hero) It’s terrible!

↳ Did Orange Badge arrive?Find the original chapter at novеlping.com.

↳ Popping out of nowhere to drop cold hard facts lol

↳ Wild Grylls) What were you doing until now?

↳ Don’t Abandon the Hero) I was being tracked, so I was running away for a bit! I’m safe now! Though I still have to sleep outdoors!

↳ Ah...

↳ Ahh...

↳ Ahhh...

↳ Wild Grylls) In that case, why don’t you come to my place? It’s surprisingly comfortable here.

↳ Don’t Abandon the Hero) I’m sorry! The Goddess does not forgive suicide!

↳ Wild Grylls) That’s harsh.

↳ Allfather) Speed Sloth... Perhaps you have discovered a new species. Scholars might be quite interested.

↳ Wild Grylls) Regular sloths have a lot of mites, right?

↳ Allfather) They do not have mites. Instead, moths or beetles inhabit them and eat the mites.

Ah. Fuck me.

↳ Allfather) Furthermore, mold likely protects them against infection.

↳ Wild Grylls) So it’s not good for me in the slightest?

↳ Allfather) Precisely. It is filthy. Extremely so.

So that means I have to give him a bath no matter what.

But I wasn’t sure if this guy would come down willingly.

The only small comfort was that there wasn’t any uncomfortable, sticky feeling.

As I mentioned earlier, he didn’t smell bad, so it was bearable.

’For now, I have no choice but to catch the Golden Frog like this.’

After catching the Golden Frog and trading with Allfather, I’ll eat the fish for lunch.

Things got a bit tangled due to Speed Sloth’s out-of-nowhere arrival, but it’s fine now.

With Speed Sloth mounted on my back, I got my gear ready.

Normally I’d strap the crossbow on my back, but because of Speed Sloth, it was hard to...

Seueuk-

"Mm?"

When I tried to sling the crossbow onto my back, he slyly shifted out of the way.

After I slung the crossbow on my back, he climbed right back up onto it.

What a ridiculously smart animal.

I felt it when he was threatening me too, but he seemed to possess quite a high intelligence.

’First Wonmo and now him—does he understand what I’m saying?’

Probably not. He’s just smart.

I carefully adjusted it so Speed Sloth wouldn’t accidentally pull the trigger.

Speed Sloth seemed to catch on to my intention, clinging to my front side so it wouldn’t be uncomfortable.

Thanks to that, I was able to come face-to-face with him. It was a face that looked foolish to anyone who saw it.

To think a guy like this can snatch fired arrows out of the air. The Forest of the Four Seasons is truly bizarre.

Seuseuseu-

It was while I was heading up toward the river where the Golden Frogs lived.

An ominous sound reached my ears. Something like a snake flicking its tongue.

Having been hit hard by a Steel-Scale Serpent before, I kept a sharp lookout on my surroundings.

But there was nothing in sight. For a moment, I wondered if I misheard, but—

"Shaaa!"

Something brown that was definitely a tree branch opened its maw wide.

Simultaneously, its brown body shifted into a bright green.

Inside its mouth, two sharp fangs protruded menacingly.

It wasn’t a tree branch, but a venomous snake.

’C-Chameleon?!’

A snake mimicking a chameleon’s camouflage! What kind of monstrous combination is this?

Surprised, I couldn’t even react properly.

In the first place, I had thought it was a branch, so I hadn’t distinguished it at all.

Chwaak!

However, there was an animal that acted before I did.

Because it happened in a split second, I couldn’t observe the process properly.

But as for the result, I could see it clearly with my own two eyes.

"Shaaa! Shaa!"

"..."

Claws far more vicious than sharp fangs pierced right through the viper’s head.

Thoroughly impaled by the claw, the viper quivered violently.

It coiled around the claw trying desperately to break free, but it was a futile effort.

It was significantly smaller than the Steel-Scale Serpent I had encountered before, and the moment its head was impaled, its fate was sealed.

Jjwaaak!

Speed Sloth yanked the snake hard with his free hand.

Thanks to that, the viper’s head split vertically down the middle.

Tuk-

Tossed onto the ground, the viper writhed. Its head, ripped open vertically, was thoroughly disgusting.

Just in case, I stabbed it with my sword to ensure I wouldn’t get bitten.

Before long, the viper’s body went completely limp.

Its body twitched occasionally, but the fact that it was dead remained unchanged.

"..."

"..."

I looked back at Speed Sloth clinging to me.

As always, he wore a relaxed expression.

Looking completely peaceful, as if asking what had just happened.

"...Want another Fasting Pill?"

Ggeudok-

Speed Sloth nodded his head.

Seriously, he was slow as hell.