I Got a Gallery in the Wild - Chapter 842

Even as the world descended into chaos over GalWiki and a flurry of other developments, one place remained tranquil.

That was none other than the Magic Tower of the Iris Kingdom—or, more specifically, Kadir’s laboratory.

At present, the Magic Tower was in utter disarray, overwhelmed by the flood of information brought on by GalWiki’s debut.

Overtime had become a daily routine, and mages collapsing from exhaustion was practically par for the course.

Mages were hardly known for their physical stamina to begin with, so having a crazy avalanche of work dumped on them naturally made them lose their minds.

GalWiki wasn’t their only headache either; the Forest of the Four Seasons suddenly manifesting in the middle of a city was just as pressing.

To figure out any hint of when it might open, Kadir had personally accepted the research commission from the Iris Kingdom.

That project alone had been brutal enough, but with GalWiki unlocking on top of it, their workforce was being ground into dust in real time.

"What is Kadir-nim doing right now?"

"It’s been almost two weeks since he last stepped out of his lab."

"What about his meals?"

"We’ve been bringing them to him in person, but..."

"If even he’s working this hard, we can hardly afford to rest."

"I haven’t been home in three weeks, though?"

"It’s been a month for me. Even the personnel we sent to the Academy are being recalled as we speak, so stop complaining and get back in there."

Even Kadir, whose authority far outranked the Tower Master’s, had holed himself up in his laboratory.

Because of that, the mages of the Magic Tower had no choice but to throw themselves into their research, if only out of sheer peer pressure.

If there was any silver lining, it was that progress had been trickling forward thanks to the opening of GalWiki.

So then, just what had Kadir been up to, shut inside his lab for weeks on end?

"Hm. Isn’t this quite beautiful enough?"

Astonishingly, inside the lab where Kadir should have been alone, an elven woman stood proudly without a stitch of clothing on.

If anyone had walked in, the sight would have made them pass out from sheer shock.

And there was one person—or rather, one entity—watching this unfold.

[You’ve finally gone senile.]

It was Kazan, the Immortal King, who was diligently living on as a skull.

Resting all alone on a chair, he muttered in what sounded close to a lament.

He lacked a physical body anyway, so a woman’s naked form meant nothing to him.

Besides, anyone who learned the elven woman’s true identity would have reacted much the same way as Kazan.

"Senile? This is the dawn of a great invention."

To Kazan’s lament, the elven woman gave a graceful spin and answered with pride.

At that, the glow in Kazan’s eye sockets died out.

For a living person, it was the equivalent of squeezing one’s eyes shut after seeing something they wished they hadn’t.

Regardless, the elven woman stood proudly before a full-length mirror, inspecting herself from head to toe.

"Now, let’s see how it looks with clothes on."

Seemingly pleased with her figure, the elven woman nodded and fumbled her clothes on.

The problem was that the garments were meant for a man, so the fit was entirely wrong.

With no underwear on hand either, she had to grunt and struggle just to put them on.

"Mmm... Do women really walk around carrying things this heavy? How inconvenient."

[You’re the one who made them that big.]

"This is an essential detail as well."

Somehow, the elven woman managed to slip into the mage robes.

Bzzt—

Then something startling happened.

The moment the clothes were on, faint cracks ran across her body.

It looked just like a shattering mirror, distorting the surface with odd warps.

Seeing this, the elven woman instinctively stroked her chin and spoke.

"Hm. It seems the fluctuations caused by donning clothes triggered a fracture."

Craaaack!

When the elven woman touched the fractured area as she muttered, the cracks spread further.

Before long, space itself cracked past her body and across her face before shattering entirely into pieces.

The shattered shards soon dissolved into particles of mana, scattering like fine dust.

"It is adequate as is, but it appears further study is required."

And from between the drifting mana particles, not a gorgeous elven woman, but a middle-aged man emerged.

Indeed. Shockingly enough, the beautiful elven woman’s true identity was Kadir.

A mage who had been researching Polymorph, inspired by VTubers.

[If only the rest of the world could see this.]

"They would be ecstatic, no doubt."

[Live long enough and you see every kind of crazy bastard.]

"Coming from the man who turned hundreds of thousands of his own subjects into undead, don’t you think that’s rich?"

Returning to his true form(?), Kadir retorted lightly and walked over.

Floating where he stopped was a recording crystal orb.This chapter is updated first at novel​ping.com.

An ideal tool for observing his transformed appearance after that Polymorph.

Flash!

As he tapped the crystal orb, the recording began to play.

First it showed him casting the Polymorph spell, checking his face and body, and so forth.

Only after confirming its flaws at the very end did Kadir smile in satisfaction.

’Still, compared to true Polymorph, this is nothing more than an optical illusion.’

The Polymorph used by the dragons of myth was not some mere trick of the eye like this.

It was magic that transformed the physical body itself, overhauling the face and build from the ground up.

If asked whether such a thing was truly possible, one could say it was difficult, but not impossible.

’Moreover, Polymorph cannot alter gender.’

Males become men, females become women.

Even the dragons of the Mythological Era could not escape that universal rule.

Of course, transplanting a brain might be another story, but that was much too far off.

’Still, seeing the clones of Sword Saint Friedrich made me realize it is within reach.’

The incident where the clones of Sword Saint Friedrich attacked Grylls was still talked about to this day.

In particular, the martial arts Friedrich wielded belonged to figures who had left massive footprints in history.

Countless techniques varied based on gender, and martial arts were certainly no exception.

’Then again, swapping out brains is terrifying, even for me.’

He might be curious, but terrifying was terrifying.

Above all, wouldn’t such a technique mean living ’eternal life’ in the truest sense?

Lucas, the God of Blacksmiths, had also said that having your brain is what makes you truly yourself, so it ran along similar lines.

[Why bother transforming into a woman instead of a man, anyway?]

As Kadir pondered deeply, Kazan chimed in with a question.

His tone was steeped in utter incomprehension, and understandably so.

In Kazan’s eyes, what Kadir was doing had long surpassed eccentricity and entered the realm of pure madness.

Of course, Polymorph was a spell with endless applications on its own.

If spies were to use it right now, wouldn’t the repercussions be staggering?

Which was precisely why Kadir replied with complete confidence.

"Does one really need a reason?"

[Hardly an answer befitting a mage.]

"Consider it a hobby."

[...]

It was absurd that he had developed such magnificent magic as a mere hobby.

And to transform into an elven woman with striking looks and a voluptuous body, rather than a young, hardy man, no less.

’Is hell the place where that bastard resides? Or is this reality, where I am forced to watch such hell, the true hell?’

Thanks to this, Kazan found himself entertaining philosophical thoughts unbecoming of an undead.

Regardless, Kadir conducted several more experiments before finally opening the Gallery.

’Ah. Come to think of it, I ought to fulfill my duties as a Chronicler.’

The Chronicler role, which he had been asked to test out by the Orange Badge, Don’t Abandon the Hero.

At first, he had worked diligently out of intrigue, but getting thoroughly absorbed in his Polymorph research had driven it from his mind.

Yet even as a Chronicler, unlike the Assistant Moderators who served as fellow laborers on the Gallery, there wasn’t all that much for him to do.

If pressed, it mostly boiled down to banning malicious users, applying temporary protections to articles, and the like.

’Starlight Lady. That Fixed Nick is practically managing Grylls’s article single-handedly.’

Grylls’s article was also handled by Starlight Lady, the new Chronicler and Assistant Moderator.

Normally, people would have kicked up a fuss about monopolies and gatekeeping, but hardly a complaint was uttered.

Title) Who the hell is this Starlight Lady?

(Neatly organized Grylls article 1)

(Neatly organized Grylls article 2)

(Neatly organized Grylls article 3)

.

.

.

(Neatly organized Grylls article xx)

Is this seriously an article compiled in less than a day?

Did that bastard seriously archive everything Grylls did up until now?

What is she, a stalker?;;

Starlight Lady) Please refer to me as his dedicated Chronicler, not a stalker.Read this novel at nove⁠lping.com for the best experience.

That’s literally what a stalker is, bitch;;

I heard stalkers never know they’re stalkers;;

Let’s Grow Trees) It looks to me like there’s still plenty to add and revise!

Starlight Lady) As I always say, please write based on objective data.

Let’s Grow Trees) I have always been objective!

Starlight Lady) Do you have proof?

Let’s Grow Trees) It’s difficult to say due to certain circumstances!

Battle of egos ON

Wait, wasn’t that knife-ear only interested in planting trees before?

GalWiki is planting trees too, yeah.

Ah, I see.

The hell you mean ’I see,’ haha.

It was truly a terrifying track record.

Starting from Grylls’s very first post on the Gallery all the way to the present.

She had meticulously organized everything based on the entire record, to the point where even Kadir could only shake his head in awe.

’Still, she organized it quite neatly. I’m almost tempted to take her on as a disciple.’

Suddenly, Ducal Lady Mercedes, Selena, with whom he had once conducted joint research, crossed his mind.

She possessed terrifying talent as well, but sadly, she was walking her own path now.

Kadir smacked his lips in regret, then moved on to the next step.

The Polymorph appeared to be a success, but the most crucial part remained.

[Wild Grylls: That’s really you, Allfather-ssi?!]

[Allfather: Indeed it is.]

Namely, getting personal verification from Grylls.

Why Grylls when there were plenty of others? Simple.

’This man would spot any uncanny feeling immediately.’

He came from a world crawling with polymorphed people—VTubers, that is.

So if something felt even slightly unnatural, he would call it out right away.

Kadir waited for the next message from Grylls.

[Wild Grylls: Umm... You’re joking, right? I mean, not that you’re ugly or anything, it just doesn’t fit your image.]

[Allfather: It truly is me. I took the photo myself as well.]

Was this what people meant by ’I didn’t lie’?

Kadir felt a strange sense of satisfaction, but it was short-lived, replaced by sheer bewilderment at the message that followed.

[Wild Grylls: Come on. No way. Looking at the video you sent, everything’s warping and distorting like crazy.]

[Allfather: Warping, you say?]

[Wild Grylls: I don’t know what kind of magic you used, but look at the background. You’re using filters, aren’t you?]

The moment he heard that, Kadir hastily rechecked the footage.

And just as Grylls had said, he spotted distortions rippling around where the face and body were.

Because he had utilized the reflective properties of mirrors, curvature warping had occurred.

"Haha."

Flustered in a way unlike his usual self, Kadir hurriedly typed a reply.

He was caught off guard, but seeing the distortion was simply hilarious.

[Allfather: A blunder on my part. It seems I must put in more effort. Haha.]

[Wild Grylls: I knew it was magic. Did you cast some sort of beauty filter spell?]

[Allfather: Something like that. Setting that aside, objectively speaking, how does the appearance look?]

[Wild Grylls: Normally I’d give you a thumbs-up emoji, but the elf next to me is...]

With Elia, the Elf Queen, standing right beside him, he couldn’t bring himself to feel impressed.

Kadir nodded as if he completely understood.

After chatting about this and that for a while longer, he closed the Gallery.

"With just a little more research, I’ll be able to stroll through the Magic Tower with my head held high."

[Crazy bastard.]

Kadir’s passion for research blazed even hotter.

Around the time everyone was spending their days so hectically,

"So, the old maid has arrived."

"You wanna die? No, before that, was that really you?"

"This lady merely stated what was written on GalWiki."

Ash had arrived at the Heavenly Demon Cult.

"You seem to think you’ll never get old."

"Be that as it may, I am still ten years younger than you."

"Haah. Seriously. And I can’t even hit you."

The two of them were already getting along splendidly.