The Extra’s Academy Survival Guide - Chapter 158

I had killed someone before.

It was an old story of the past.

As Ed Rothstaylor, it had already been quite some time since I began struggling to survive in that cruel world… Though, the time I spent in my previous world was several dozen times longer than the time I had lived in my current world.

So, I was still just a stranger in the world.

To me, the act of killing people in modern warfare was so simple that I wondered if it was really okay. Just aim your sight, hold your breath, and pull the trigger and it’s done.

And just like that, a person’s life came to an end. It was simple and clean enough to make one laugh.

At first, I didn’t even realize that I had taken someone’s life like that. My hands trembled at what I had just committed so casually. I felt rather bewildered, not realizing and truly feeling what I had just done.

The really scary thing was when I went to bed that night.

Those facial expressions I saw through the sight, their lively gestures, and the traces of life that quickly disappeared as soon as they were struck with a single shot. All that remained of them was a chunk of flesh.

The moment I realized that fact, I was filled with guilt, like a nightmare that corroded my mind.

That was something that happened to everyone on the battlefield.

On a battlefield, where your life was at risk, you didn’t feel it because you were only saving your life. But when you retired and moved into a peaceful world… Those memories returned like ghosts, trying to eat away at your sanity.

It was a disease like measles that anyone who had lived on the battlefield for several years suffered through. But over time, it was something that you could recover from.

I also had a severe case of those ‘measles’ once, but I quickly overcame it. I regained weight, met with friends, joked around, watched a few movies and played a few games, and my outlook on life became clearer.

Now, I didn’t do anything cruel that would make me suffer from those memories again. Yet occasionally, from time to time, they did come back.

After killing someone for the first time, the feeling of guilt that flooded one’s mind was the same for everyone.

That was particularly the case in times of war. During those times, normally one would mentally escape from it all, as there was no choice but to kill them. Because in order to survive, you had to kill the other person.

That was something that couldn’t be helped.

Mentally escaping was something that everyone did, and I was no exception.

Even the upper officers understood that fact. By looking at the faces of the soldiers, which were starting to change little by little, you could gauge their fighting spirit.

The issue was, there were those who ended up going the other way. Perhaps those were the people I had been the wariest of and distanced myself from.

—Because I thought that, if I were careless, I could become like that, too.

It was reasonable to run away, justifying it to yourself by saying that it was something you had to do. However, those who rationalized the truth by saying, ‘I always used to be like this…’

Those were the really dangerous guys.

They always loved killing.

A person who took pleasure in stealing another’s life.

To them, there was no such thing as guilt. They had no intention of being understood.

Running away from your guilt and saying such a thing, in the end you would only end up mistaking yourself for being ‘pure evil’.

Free from the guilt that ate away at their minds, they spent years on the battlefield, becoming monsters. All before ultimately retiring.

If things went well, they could get a job in the defense or security-related industry and live a life where they were socially treated no different from madmen. But those who went in the wrong direction and weren’t so lucky end up smuggling guns and hanging around gangs, only to die with a bullet shot through their jaws.

True to those words, I had experience turning my life around right on the brink of turning into one of those madmen… Thinking about it again sent chills running down my spine.

That was why I lived a life fighting against my guilt to the end.

Living as such, I became a person who did not hastily take responsibility for anyone else, nor did I try to save someone from a crisis without reason.

I just didn’t want to face the heartache and pain that would come if I failed… It was such an absurd reason. But still, I believed it was the right choice for me to make.

Those who strayed were not just murderous maniacs who enjoyed killing. They were unable to bear a single ounce of guilt, running away… Just like fucking cowards.

That was why there was a question that I always wanted to ask those bastards who had gone astray.

…Do you still treasure the feeling you felt when you first killed someone?

* * *

Drip!

The sound of blood dripping. The seal of the evil god engraved on Krepin’s left hand began to turn red.

The dripping blood filled the gaps in the seal as an ominous magic power energy began to bloom.

Soon, that magic power began to wrap around Krepin’s entire hand. That vast energy transformed his entire left forearm into a grotesque mass of flesh.

Karuk! Pwshh!

A few tentacles sprouted out from his left hand as they wrapped around the nearby area. Although Krepin was still in the form of a human, if you only looked at his left hand, he looked no different than a monster.

In his right hand he held a long sword with the seal of the house. Unlike his left hand, which had been transformed into a grotesque shape, it was still completely fine.

“I can feel the power.”

Krepin spoke in a gentle tone.

“I’ve always wanted this kind of power. Now, the magic of immortality isn’t far away.”

Saying that, he clenched his grotesque left hand.

—At that moment, Storm’s Blessing disappeared.

I couldn’t even feel the magic power. At a speed that was impossible for a person to react to, he gathered and compressed the pressure around me.

It was useless to wait for the re-activation of Storm’s Blessing, and it was clear that I could never drop my guard against him.

It was impossible to avoid Krepin’s attack by reacting in response to his flow of magic power.

It was the same in , but there was a pretty big difference between hearing the in-game explanation and actually doing it in real life.

I had to dodge his attacks by predicting how he would attack by only looking at how he physically moved. It was similar to the idea of dodging a bullet by looking at the direction of the muzzle. It seemed possible in words, but actually doing it was a near impossible feat.

However, just because it was unreasonable, didn’t mean that I shouldn’t give it a try. After all, I had already climbed to the top of that hell.

Either I would defeat Krepin, or I would die. Now that it had come to one of those two options, I wouldn’t act hastily, nor would I act too cautiously.

Kyaaaaaghk!

The high-ranking wind spirit Merilda’s roar echoed through the grounds of Rothstaylor Mansion.

She tried to smash Krepin’s body with her forelegs, but when he twisted his left hand strangely, an unknown physical force blocked Merilda’s forelegs.

I tried to cast the elemental magic Wind Blade towards Krepin. However, as expected, it was also neutralized by an unknown force just before it reached him.

Just as Lucy said, he used magic that was outside of the realm of normal types. And that was the power of Mebula.

But if it was a fight against a magic power that was impossible to understand, I also knew how to use one.

A dark red energy rose up as it began to wrap around my body. I gathered Celestial magic power at the tip of my finger before sending it straight at Krepin.

Krepin briefly frowned. His eyes widened as if it was hard to believe that I could use Celestial Magic. However, that wasn’t a situation where he could afford to be surprised.

Forced Collection.

The power of Celestial Magic surpassed all innate relationships between objects. It was similar to Mebula’s power in that it was impossible to deal with.

Krepin was in trouble, as he thought that he was the only one with a power that could surpass the innate relationship between objects.

In an instant, Krepin’s body was pulled right towards me. By the time he realized it, my dagger was already right in front of me. However, at an unbelievable speed, a tentacle grabbed my arm.

Kadedeuk.

I clenched my teeth as it grabbed my hand.

About five or six tentacles protrude from his left arm. Each of them were wriggling in their own way, smashing everything around them.

I strengthened my arm as I turned around and pulled it towards the greatsword that was stuck on the floor. While doing so, I dragged the tentacle towards the blade of the greatsword, cutting them off from me. I shook off the remaining part that stuck to my arm.

The reflexes of the tentacles were absolutely absurd. It was impossible to be sure that I would win against him in close combat.

I had suddenly cast Celestial Magic without any warning, but he still managed to deal with it impressively.

I stood back up again as I stared straight at Krepin.

Krepin Rothstaylor’s mid-battle pattern had always been like that. In close combat, the tentacles protruding from his left hand were utilized, and in long-distance battles, he used the magic power of the Evil God to cast magic.

Midway through the battle against Krepin, maintaining distance like that was the common strategy. Trading blows in close-combat and responding with magic when the distance was greater.

Having the sense to recognize what he would do from what range, it was possible to read Krepin’s attacks. Thanks to the tentacles, he was extremely powerful in close combat. However, when he gathered magic power, he wouldn’t be able to react as quickly. I needed to take advantage of that timing.

“Whew…”

Krepin let out a long sigh, relaxing his body. Then, little by little, his body began to float in the air. That marked the beginning of the real battle.

An aerial view of the mansion, where Mebula and Lucy’s battle was in full swing. With countless magic circles being cast and disappearing behind him, his body floated higher, little by little.

His collar flapped in the air as if he were a ghost. A strong wind began to blow through the rooftop.

“My son, Ed Rothstaylor. He has always been a coward.”

Krepin knew everything. The fact that Ed Rothstaylor had seen Krepin’s darkness, but never ended up rebelling against him in the end.

“He had no ambitions and only thought of living peacefully with the family and the vassals. Maybe that wasn’t appropriate as the eldest son of a noble family, but it was a fine attitude for my son. After all, having useless ambition never helps.”

At that moment, Krepin narrowed the distance quickly as he held out his long sword. Even a simple stab became a fatal surprise attack thanks to the fact he could fly around using Mebula’s magic power.

Clang!

As I evaded, taking a big leap backwards, the longsword—which had nowhere to strike—ended up striking the floor.

“It’s not that I don’t understand why he ran away to Silvenia. However, to have planned to purposely use the princess to be excommunicated! I didn’t think he would be that meticulous. So, when I heard that he was still alive, I was skeptical. He wasn’t the type to survive something like that.”

“In the first place, aren’t you the one who sent Kadek and Nox to kill me?”

“No, I’m not talking about that time.”

Krepin seemed to be vaguely aware that I was a separate person from Ed Rothstaylor.

It wasn’t impossible to understand, but it was strange to come to such a conclusion, because there was no clear evidence.

And that reason. Krepin explained it clearly.

“It’s already been over a year and a half since I sent the letter informing him that he had been excommunicated.”

Krepin Rothstaylor’s letter of excommunication.

It was the first document I looked at when I came to this world, and it was the only medium through which I was able to grasp my situation after being kicked out of Ophelis Hall.

For me, it was a letter that started the whole story. It signaled the start of my survival in that shitty world.

“After that, before he was expelled from Ophelis Hall, the reply my son sent me… I guess you wouldn’t know.”

“What did you say?”

Now, that was a completely new piece of information.

If there was a reply to that letter, it wasn’t from me… It was certainly from Ed Rothstaylor, before I possessed him.

Krepin’s remarks that followed were completely unexpected.

“He said that he no longer felt a reason to live. He meticulously wrote down every single feeling he felt before dying, sending it to me. He didn’t even bother telling Tanya.”

At those words, I took a deep breath.

Ed Rothstaylor abandoned the prestige of his house and ran away. Only then did he realize that there was no longer a place for him in the world.

He drowned in an endless emptiness as he looked down quietly at the school outside his window.

In a quiet room. It was nearly time for him to get kicked out. A life where he would have to endure pennilessness all on his own in the cruel world. The only future left for him was darkness.

After sitting quietly alone in that room, the path he ended up choosing… Was the end of his life’s journey.

There were many ways he could do it in a quiet and secluded room. All one would need was a rope and a chair that was easy to knock over.

However, I was certain that I remembered seeing Ed Rothstaylor’s face briefly being shown in the ending credits. He didn’t look great, but I definitely remembered that he was still alive.

The difference between my memory and reality.

Ed Rothstaylor was certainly going to end his life that day.

However, even that failed.

Even his death didn’t go according to his plan. Why?

The only thing that could be considered the cause is—

To be honest, I was incredibly surprised.

Bell Maya.

The day I was kicked out of Ophelis Hall. Despite having a reputation that was nothing more than a fool, she strangely wanted to take care of me.

I thought she was just a person without any prejudice, fulfilling her duty as a maid of Ophelis Hall….

But I had no idea that you were living like this… When you left Ophelis Hall, you had an expression on your face that made it seem like it was the end of the world. I thought you would end up leaving the school.

Anyway, I’m relieved that you’re doing well.

The meaning in each of her lines felt completely new.

She had said that as if she was relieved, seeing me become healthier and more outgoing after that incident.

Managing to always maintain her professionalism, she never went against my feelings.

Whenever she had free time, she came to the camp to check on me, and if there was anything she could do to help, she would do so.

Seeing what she did, I always thought she was treating me strangely well. However, that was because the maid Bell Maya, who was in charge of Ed Rothstaylor, had witnessed the moment he made an extreme decision, coming to stop him.

Then the confusion behind Bell Maya’s unnatural actions were all coming together like pieces of a puzzle. Even the reason why I came to that world started to come to mind.

Ed Rothstaylor, who had lost his will to survive. He didn’t want to live a life of darkness any longer.

I… received the life that he abandoned.

Slash.

Was he aiming for the moment I was caught in my thoughts?

Krepin’s blade pierced my shoulder. I couldn’t feel his magic power, as it was a speed that was hard to notice.

As the pain rose in my arm, I could see Krepin grinning right in front of me.

My body, which had already reached its limit, screamed out. Then I felt my consciousness slowly fading.

* * *

A strong wind blew around the annex of the mansion.

Everyone gathered at the mansion could see what was unfolding with their own two eyes.

Above the rooftop, there was a man fighting with an ominous energy.

A massive wolf roared as it ran wild. The night sky over the mansion was lit up with all sorts of different advanced magics being sent back and forth.

There, if I closed my eyes, it felt as if I was in a pure white room staring into a mirror.

In front of a large mirror that reflected my entire body, I brought over a wooden chair, sitting down.

A blonde man, with a serious expression, sat in the mirror with his hands together, looking directly at me.

Mirrors reflect everything in the world equally. However, it sometimes felt like something on the inside was peeking out.

The blonde man in the mirror looked straight at me with a somewhat unfamiliar gaze.

Ed Rothstaylor was staring at me.

The look in his eye showed he was thinking back on his life, where he faced a massive injustice but didn’t fight back. He couldn’t do anything aside from running away.

He had too much work to do.

Kicked out of the Ophelis Hall, he had to find a place to live right away. He was still a student, but there wasn’t any way to get help to pay the tuition. He only had a few pieces of clothes to wear, as well as minimal food to eat. His reputation in school was also bad, so there was no place he could go to ask for help.

Even after running away, there was no place for him to rest comfortably… It might have been better for him to just give up on life instead.

Clenching his teeth, he struggled, managing to escape from the darkness of his house… But the result at the end of it all was in vain. Life in itself was worthless.

Receiving the baton at that point, what kind of life did I end up living?

I slept less than four hours a day, struggling to survive in whatever way I could…

I broke off pieces of bark and boiled them to eat. I continued to use my old clothes by sewing them. I somehow managed to utilize magic theory with my body despite having a worthless talent in it.

Only by clenching my teeth and bearing through it all was I able to create a simple but scrappy camp.

Eventually, there was a large cabin, a couple of storages made of timber, a campfire that was great to start a fire in, and a wooden shelter where Lucy sometimes came to sleep. There was also the cabin where Yennekar was staying. Soon, there would also be Lortel’s villa, which she was starting to build, as well as Bell, who came by often to lend a helping hand.

It had become a hideout that I didn’t want to give up to anyone else. I could even say that it had truly become my home.

My position within the school had also changed a lot.

My grades improved, I became a scholarship student, and I recently became the top student in my grade. There were also a bunch of underclassmen who follow me around quite a bit.

As I walked around school, there were now quite a few people who looked my way and greeted me. I’d also grown to know quite a few influential people, so people no longer said that I had no connections.

“I’m jealous of you.”

The source of the suddenly raised voice was me inside the mirror.

After saying that, the man—who had his head lowered—didn’t say anything else.

I sat down in front of the man as I stared at him.

That boy who had his head lowered for a while.

He had already lost the will to live. All he wanted to do was rest comfortably.

However, I had something I needed to say to him.

“It’s okay. So, you should rest in peace now.”

“You’ve already done enough… So, I’ll take care of the rest for you.”

Perhaps my thoughts had reached him, as the boy continued to keep his head lowered.

Kwak!

I grabbed Krepin’s right hand, which was stabbing my shoulder. It was the last thing I did before my vision returned.

As Merilda’s rising wind enveloped our surroundings, she got rid of some of Mebula’s magic power that was floating around… I grabbed Krepin’s right arm as I threw it back.

Kwang! Boom!

“Keuheuk…”

Krepin, who didn’t expect a counterattack, thinking that he had cleanly landed a critical blow, let out a moan. It seemed like he had received a major shock as his back hit the floor.

The sword piercing my shoulder also went deeper from the impact. However, I clenched my teeth as I pulled it out. Blood was oozing out of the wound as the pain welled up… After clenching my teeth and bearing with the pain, I put my foot on the fallen Krepin.

Blood dripped down.

He was already covered in blood as my own dripped onto top of him.

“Keheuk…”

I gasped for air. I couldn’t breathe like I wanted to. Nevertheless, I clenched my teeth as if they were going to shatter as I raised the dagger.

Even the ceremonial dagger was completely soaked in blood.

I’d already experienced moments of crisis in my life multiple times. Before and after coming to that world, it was all the same.

I’d even experienced death. There were also many times when I was seriously injured, and there were times when I even collapsed from overworking.

There were countless hardships that chased after me as if I were cursed. Despite them chasing after my life, I overcame all of them.

When I was running around on the battlefield, I remembered what my comrades had said to me.

It wasn’t a great nickname, since I didn’t like how it sounded.

“I’m a cockroach.”

Not caring about my dripping blood, I pinned Krepin down. Looking down at Krepin, as I spoke.

I ground my teeth as I brought the dagger down.

Thwack!

He managed to block it with his left arm. Putting strength into my trembling hands, I somehow managed to lower the dagger, piercing through that grotesque arm of his.

Krepin clenched his teeth again as he endured it through his strength.

“I will never die. Never”

He spoke in a cold voice. Even those corrupt eyes of his seemed to be cold.

Out of sheer grit, he somehow continued to struggle clenching his teeth.