It's my fault.
I was needlessly greedy.
I tried to erase his memories while deceiving myself.
Even though I knew it wasn't for his sake.
"Why did I... why did I do that... Aaah-!!"
Bang bang-!!
Luna screamed and slammed her head against the wall.
Her forehead turned red, but she didn't stop.
"Uaah-!! You idiot-!! Why did you do that-!! Why were you so greedy-!!"
Luna wanted to turn back time.
She wanted to make up for her mistake.
But knowing the Holy Sword wasn't such a convenient thing,
Luna had no choice but to hate her past self.
"Stupid Luna... what kind of Hero... can't even control her own greed..."
Haah-
Luna sighed, her heart heavy.
Still, she couldn't just sit still.
Luna decided to make up for her mistake through action.
"He seemed really angry... if I do better than usual... he'll forgive me, right? No, I'm so shameless..."
Already thinking about being forgiven.
"You idiot-!!"
Bang bang-!!
Luna slammed her head against the wall again.
Each time, the building seemed to shake, but no one complained to Luna.
The children were grateful for Luna's actions breaking the silence, as the house had been too quiet.
Luna stopped headbutting and pressed her forehead against the wall.
"Disappointing him... idiot..."
Still.
If time passes and I work hard, his anger will subside.
"So I...! I'll train hard...!"
Luna pulled herself together and gripped her wooden sword.
She started training in her room, swinging her sword, determined to make dramatic progress and earn his praise.
However, contrary to Luna's thoughts,
the situation didn't flow according to the scenario she wanted.
The next day.
Luna came out to the kitchen earlier than usual.
"A-alright! I'll make things right!"
Clenching her fists with determination,
Luna decided to finish preparing all the ingredients before he arrived.
"Usually Hare and he did most of it! But today I'll do it alone!"
Chop- chop-
Luna focused on the knife as she cut the vegetables.
Her movements were awkward, unfamiliar with cooking.
"Ah, ouch! I cut myself a little... this much is fine...!"
She got a small cut on her finger.
But Luna didn't think much of the wound.
She finished preparing the ingredients by the time he and Hare arrived.
Then, seeing his face, she called out with the brightest expression she could muster.
"M-Mr. Krandel! Good morning! I prepared all the breakfast ingredients! Hehe!"
Ta-da-
Luna confidently introduced the vegetables she'd cut with a bright expression.
In contrast, his face was cold, unlike Luna's.
"I see, good job."
"Huh?"
"Good job."
"..."
It was praise.
But she wasn't happy at all.
Because there was no soul in his praise.
It was too dry to be called praise, like a robot just delivering the conclusion that she did well.
Luna turned her head to hide her expression.
"The temperature... the temperature is different..."
It's not warm like usual, it's cold.
This isn't...
This isn't the kind of praise he used to give.
Luna made a tearful face alone in the corner of the dining hall.
The changed temperature made her so sad.
*I did do wrong...!! It is my fault...!!*
I'd rather he get angry.
If punishment would bring back the way things were,
I'd definitely accept it.
Luna stole glances at him preparing breakfast.
His expression was even more rigid than yesterday.
It was enough to feel shock and fear.
*If he stays like that forever and never goes back to how he was...*
What should I do?
How can I get his forgiveness?
The fear that things couldn't return to how they were.
Luna bit her lip hard and muttered.
"I don't want that...! I like the old him better..."
It must be because my effort today wasn't enough.
An unbreakable spirit.
Luna rekindled her determination to make up for her mistake.
Certainly.
The atmosphere in the house has sunk.
After that incident,
a week has passed, but the Hero Party's mood is still gloomy.
"The only one who's the same as usual is Estia."
"Hm? Why me?"
"Nothing, just calling you. Keep doing what you were doing."
"Okay~!"
Estia shouted loudly and looked at her book.
She wasn't reading, just drawing pictures, but since her teacher still hadn't arrived,
I decided not to worry about it.
"That teacher I forgot about. When is he coming anyway?"
"I know! Maybe he died!?"
"Don't say such brutal things so cheerfully, Estia."
"Okay~!"
"..."
She knows she did well, which makes it more annoying.
Estia's confidence has broken through the stratosphere.
If I leave her like this, won't she become too arrogant?
I was worried about that.
"Should I press down on her head? Though she won't grow any taller..."
"What, Oppa? What did you just say? You insulted me, didn't you?"
"I didn't insult you."
"Really? Then it's fine!"
Estia focused on her drawing again.
Since there was nothing more to talk about with Estia,
I got up and headed to the hallway.
Estia seemed so focused she didn't even notice me leaving.
"...I hope that teacher comes soon."
Estia, limited in her use of Divine Power.
I don't know when that teacher will come, but
when they do, her skills will grow beyond recognition.
Since a Saint's power begins from the spirit,
if Estia starts learning to utilize Divine Power now, the Hero Party's strength will surely increase.
"That aside."
I walked down the hallway and looked out the window at the sound of the wind.
"Luna is training again today."
Every day.
She trains hard.
She takes the initiative in other tasks too.
It probably looks like she's trying harder because she's reflecting on her mistake, but
contrary to Luna's efforts, my emotions didn't move easily.
*...It's more accurate to say my emotions have stopped.*
The four who incited others against Estia as a traitor and tried to erase Aina's memories.
The emotions inside me still haven't been sorted out, and whenever I see their faces, my heart grows cold.
I don't want to treat them with emotion, just respond out of obligation.
Currently, Luna, Hare, Saten, and Minerva were in such a relationship.
And.
[I need to talk to you, Jun-woo. Can we talk? Will you come to the library now?]
[1. Okay.]
[2. No.]
"Minerva. You especially shouldn't have done that."
I ignored Minerva's choices as usual and quietly watched Luna outside the window.
Recently, I can feel that she's making an effort and reflecting, but...
*Still not yet, I guess.*
I didn't have the confidence to face Luna and treat her like before.
Even now, a week later, I didn't want to have a conversation with her at all.
"...I don't know who the child is anymore."
I looked at Luna outside the window with emotionless eyes and left.
The last glimpse of Luna swinging her sword seemed to show her shedding tears.
Thud-
Saten closed the book she was reading.
She was sitting in a chair reading, but Saten felt she was different from usual.
"...I can't read."
Thump- thump-
After that incident with him,
a week has passed.
At first, Saten didn't feel her heart pounding violently.
"It's natural to be punished for doing wrong."
When the punishment ends, I just need to reflect.
If I do that, he'll sort out his emotions and treat me kindly again.
Information gained from observing the process with other children.
However, Saten realized she was wrong.
"Why aren't you going through that process this time, Mr. Krandel?"
My heart feels stuffy.
I can breathe, but
it's like it's blocked—I can't exhale.
"This is a damn situation..."
Smack-!
Saten impulsively threw the book on the floor.
Though her condition improved slightly, it was still difficult.
What was the cause of this situation?
The result of her cold judgment was only one thing.
"Mr. Krandel. You're making me like this."
Why
did you make me aware of this pain?
Saten writhed in agony and rolled on the bed.
"I did wrong. Why won't you forgive me? You should forgive me if I apologize and reflect."
Saten kept muttering to herself in frustration.
He didn't listen, but each time she voiced her own mistakes, she could breathe a little easier.
"...I'd rather you punish me than this."
And erasing that woman from his memories
would be much more helpful rationally.
Why didn't he do that?
Saten, unable to understand the emotions between Lee Jun-woo and Aina,
repeated the process of saying she did wrong to relieve her guilt.
However, Saten, too clumsy with emotions, couldn't resolve everything.
Scrape-
"As expected, this is best for me... The wrist is good since it won't kill me."
Saten, unable to bear the mental pain,
hurt herself with a knife to relieve the suffering.
Since she always wore bandages on her wrists, there was no chance of him finding out.
"Haah, I can breathe a little... When will he return to how he was? No... maybe he was always still, and I was the one who moved backward."
Maybe I'm the one who moved back.
Saten exhaled a frustrated breath.
"Painful memories of the past are never good... why does he hold onto that pain? If I had the chance, I'd erase all my bad memories from the past. Is this what books call a 'difference in perspective'?"
I want to go back to how things were.
To when he paid attention to me.
To when there was no indifference.
Saten made a small wish and lay on the bed, closing her eyes.
In this state, she couldn't read anyway, so she was trying to escape into dreams.
"...How can I regain his attention? I guess asking directly would be fastest...?"
Saten answered her own question and slowly drifted into sleep.
Blood from her wrist soaked her palm.
Saten wished he would hold her red hand.
She was clearly feeling the loneliness of an empty space.